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Café Con Monica

On friends…

September 13, 2013

So many of you know I have been home almost 2 months now. Luckily I got home while summer was still in full swing which has kept me ridiculously busy. Not only was I enjoying every bit of sun I could catch and every chance I could to catch up or attend some event in the city I have also been looking for a job, trying very very hard not to completely wipe out the bit of savings I came home with and to make sure I make just enough time with The Boy to keep him from giving up hope on me.

Its has been amazing, exhausting and sometimes just down right frustrating. I usually am great ok at managing my time but recently I am starting to feel like I am completely in capable. I continually double book things, I forget completely or just get to the point where I am so tired I don’t even want to bother.

Anyway the point of this post is not all of that its about making friends. So as the story goes about 5 years ago I moved from the suburbs of Chicago into the city and realized I had all of 3 good friends left and of those 2, one of them was a terribly toxic friendship and the other had just moved to New York and the other was a G who had recently entered into a toxic relationship that meant I was never seeing him anymore(she hated me). I wanted to make new friends, people I could do fun things in Chicago with, I could travel with, have to talk to who weren’t busy with their boyfriends or kids.

I took to the internet as a way to find other girls who might be in similar situations and just wanted to make some new friends. Luck would have it there were A LOT of girls in Chicago looking for friends because making friends after college is EFFING hard! So anyway after organizing dinners once or twice a month with 20+ girls who were always welcome to invite other girls I finally met my core group of girls who just meshed perfectly. They understood my over the top personality and didn’t judge me for not giving a shit if you like that I get rowdy when I am happy.

So 4 years passed by and things were great! Along the way I discovered meetup.com and immediately loved it. There are so many groups of girls on there looking for other girls to do things with. So many groups in general for ALL interests.

Then I decided to move to Thailand/China for a year.

And that brings us to now…Ive been home 2 months now like I said and I am realizing that my decision to pick up and leave Chicago for a year has cost me a lot of friendships. No one was angry or mean about it but most just decided that my decision meant our friendship wasn’t as important anymore and moved on with their lives. So I returned to find my two best friends(and even those friendships are different than they were before) and not much more than that. Sure everyone keeps in touch via social media and an occasional call but they have all made new friends or just in general moved on with their lives and are not interested.

So after all this I ask…what am I supposed to do with that? How am I supposed to feel about this? I came home thinking my relationships/friendships with people would pick right up and was genuinely heartbroken to find that is not the case.

For now I have decided to not take it personally because that is just how life goes…right? People change over time and move on with their lives how they see fit. I recently decided to make a meetup group for couples to make friends with other couples and I promised myself I would make an effort to meet more Chicago bloggers and attend more events so that I can get out there and meet new people.

But I tell you…it is hard!!

So thats all I have for now….a  long ass post about how I am feeling. Hopefully sometime soon I can report progress on this front!  Do you have any experience with making friends after college??

Filed in: Social • by Monica •

Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone….

August 28, 2013

Since I started a job this week…hold the applause I just took it to cover the bills until I find something better…..I am very much in a brain fart so I thought it would be fun to do this little blog award thing I saw over at Not Entirely Perfect ! 
Had to pick a song for the title…at least I think I was supposed to? Anyway, I love that song and if you dont know it here ya go: 
Now I am supposed to answer 10 questions! 

1. What is your favorite TV show currently on Netflix? Hmmm I used netflix to catch up on Sons of Anarchy and The Game 

2. What color do you look best in? I would automatically say black because its slimming but I actually think I look really good in bright colors especially if I am tan then they just look really great with my skin tone. 

3.Which Disney Princess are you most like? Hmmm thats a hard one. I think I am like Ariel. I am a dreamer and always getting myself into something and I won’t lie I have a bit of hoarding tendencies when it comes to papers. 

4. Favorite cartoon growing up? Hmmm haha I was a real Disney kid so to be honest I don’t remember watching much cartoons but I did love Chip & Dale’s Rescue Rangers! 

5. Go to drink at a coffee shop?  Well…I gave up coffee 7 years ago so usually some kind of tea or something with chocolate. When its cold I almost always order hot chocolate w/peppermint & cinnamon anywhere I can 

6. Favorite blogs you found recently that you want to share? haha well I would share the blog I got this from Stephanie is hilarious! Also, I recently found and fell in blogger love with Erin at The Party Girls Guide I love anyone who tells it like it is and can curse in her blogs without apologizing! 

7. First store you look at when you have money? 
Does Priceline count? if not then Zappos and Coach…haha big difference I know. Usually I want to spend money on vacation instead of clothes but when I want something fashionable its usually a purse or shoes. 

8. What is your Instagram account? monipins 

9. Things about fall your most looking forward to? Ooh the boots. I love wearing boots…and I have so many! Haha and being able to drink warm drinks outside…ooh and not having to sweat to death in my non AC having vehicle! 

10. Whats your favorite thing to win in blog Giveaways? Haha I NEVER win…well there was one time but then I never got any of the things I won which really sucked. I would say I like gift cards to shops that I have never heard of before. Its fun to find new things. 

 I am just going to post 10 questions and if you want to post on your blog send a link in the comments so I can check it out or just feel free to answer! 

1. Fall TV-what show are you excited to have start again? 
2. What is one item you must have with you everyday? 
3. Biggest pet peeve? 
4. Favorite Social media site? 
5. Do you like link-ups? If so which is your fave? 
6. What is/are your favorite dessert or sweets? 
7. What song can you listen to right now over and over and not get tired of? 
8. Number 1 goal to accomplish before the end of 2013? 
9. If you could eat one thing everyday for a month what would it be? 
10. All time favorite lyric? 

















Filed in: Other, Social • by Monica •

This time around…

August 13, 2013

So I was gone for a week. Since I got home last month I have been go go go and I realized that I wasn’t making time to read blogs or comment and barely even post. I stopped interacting with  my favorite blog people and my posts just became summaries of what I was doing and there was no depth to them.

I still have so much I want to tell you guys about my experiences living in Thailand and China and how I feel that have changed me for better and worse. But for right now I have to focus on finding a job and maybe an apartment soon after and getting things worked out with being back in school.

So if you are in Chicago, lets hang out! If your not please forgive me for the less than deep posts that will continue coming. I promise to be better about reading and commenting as well I don’t want to completely miss out on whats is going on with all my favorite bloggy people!

Ooh and I leave you with this song…because I love Miranda Lambert 🙂

Filed in: Other, Social • by Monica •

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